The Hungry Barbarian

Really I can’t repeat it enough.  Oh sure its great to go out with a couple buddies, with some beer, sandwiches and kick back for the day.  That’s all fine and dandy, a great saturday really with catching anything just an afterthought.  But when you’re pretty damn hungry and sick of eating mussels (so sick in fact you refuse to chew them, but just swallow them whole), some fresh fish can dramatically change your outlook on life.

That is if you catch any.

The worst part is I’m convinced the family curse lives on.  Oh what you didn’t know?  My family is cursed when it comes to catching fish.  My father has been on boats with people who swear they can catch fish under any condition, and the conditions would be perfect, only to find the sea devoid of life.  

Most famously in my family lore is the time my cousin, uncle, father and I went fishing on a Great Lake.  Fishing in order, the first two members of the boat caught fish in rapid succession.  My father was up third.  For the next 6 hours we trolled back and forth at 3 miles an hour trying to get even a hint of a nibble.  Finally the exasperated crew, and family, gave up deciding to pack it in for the day.  

However when the line was being reeled in, someone felt something on it.  ”A fish?” everyone wondered.  My father grabbed the line, but kept asking if anything was really on the hook.  ”There’s nothing fighting or anything, what gives?”  My father reeled it in quickly, quicker than normal, until there was 10 feet of line left.  It was then we saw what had happened.

My father had hogtied the fish.

The line was wrapped around the fish’s neck and gills until its eyes were bulging out.  The thing was either already dead or praying to be put out of its misery, yet it was the best catch my father had likely every gotten.  The filets came home with us.

It would be great if this sort of thing skipped a generation and my kids were the suckers, but its not meant to be.  On a recent fishing trip I sat from 8 until 1 in the morning.  While others around me caught something.  The only thing on my line however was my cousin’s or people on the opposite side of the boat.  The threatened to murder me for the constant distraction.  Like I had any control over where my line went.

My most infamous fishing experience occured when I went for fluke with my best friend Danny (who fishes all the time; his voicemail for years announced he couldn’t answer his phone because he was at the beach) and instead hooked his mother’s nose.  No joke.

So pardon me if I was a little bent out of shape when the curse continued and it was back to damn mussels:

Sure I’m a bit repetitive on the issue, but I think I made my point.  

Oh and here’s a second video, just for Danny.  I know he’s sure to chime in due to me bashing his beloved hobby:

No, seriously, how do you sit and perform that excercise in boredom?  I sure can’t figure it out.

This entry was posted on Thursday, June 12th, 2008 at 10:00 pm and is filed under Day 3. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.